We are what we are born into

It is absolutely incredible to experience the dimensions and depth that opens in your life when you become a parent. For me, I see all of my carefully packed baggage come pouring out all over, like a bad day at the airport. I see myself doing things and responding in ways I SWORE up and down I would never do to my kids. I find myself preferring the company of one against another at times, then switching, depending on how incredibly annoying one is being at the time. I try, but I see my father in my parenting a lot.


Genesis 27:41-28:9
"Esau held a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing his father had given him. He said to himself, "The days of mourning for my father are near; then I will kill my brother Jacob." 42 When Rebekah was told what her older son Esau had said, she sent for her younger son Jacob and said to him, "Your brother Esau is consoling himself with the thought of killing you. 43 Now then, my son, do what I say: Flee at once to my brother Laban in Haran. 44 Stay with him for a while until your brother's fury subsides. 45 When your brother is no longer angry with you and forgets what you did to him, I'll send word for you to come back from there. Why should I lose both of you in one day?" 46 Then Rebekah said to Isaac, "I'm disgusted with living because of these Hittite women. If Jacob takes a wife from among the women of this land, from Hittite women like these, my life will not be worth living." 28 So Isaac called for Jacob and blessed him and commanded him: "Do not marry a Canaanite woman. 2 Go at once to Paddan Aram, to the house of your mother's father Bethuel. Take a wife for yourself there, from among the daughters of Laban, your mother's brother. 3 May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples. 4 May he give you and your descendants the blessing given to Abraham, so that you may take possession of the land where you now live as an alien, the land God gave to Abraham." 5 Then Isaac sent Jacob on his way, and he went to Paddan Aram, to Laban son of Bethuel the Aramean, the brother of Rebekah, who was the mother of Jacob and Esau. 6 Now Esau learned that Isaac had blessed Jacob and had sent him to Paddan Aram to take a wife from there, and that when he blessed him he commanded him, "Do not marry a Canaanite woman," 7 and that Jacob had obeyed his father and mother and had gone to Paddan Aram. 8 Esau then realized how displeasing the Canaanite women were to his father Isaac; 9 so he went to Ishmael and married Mahalath, the sister of Nebaioth and daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, in addition to the wives he already had." 

However, seeing my father in my parenting is not all bad. I tell my children I love them, because he always told me. I try to show them how to be strong and brave, like my father was with me. I try to teach them to protect others around them, the way my dad did with people around him. I teach them the value of working hard and being responsible and not acting like a jackass in front of people, because that was what my dad did with me.

Like with Isaac, Esau, and Jacob, certain patterns are indelibly passed on from one generation to another. Isaac was the spoiled favorite child of doting old parents.His half brother was kicked out of the house for teasing him one day. He was given a fortune and a life of luxury. So he favored and spoiled Esau in return, but then turned against him when Jacob proved more hungry and crafty and clever. Esau then became the brother left out in the cold.